The Home: The Major Influence On Our Children
HaRav Michel Yehuda Lefkowitz, ZL, spoke extensively about the influences on children and the role of parents and teachers in ensuring their appropriateness.
Regarding the role of parents, he said, the home in general and parents in particular are the main influence s on children.
He quoted the source for this outlook from the Gemara at the end of Tractate Sukkah about Miriam Bas Bilga, the daughter of one of the leading priestly families. We are told that Miriam went off the derech by denouncing her faith, intermarrying and publically blaspheming the Holy Service of the Bais HaMikdash. Her parents were blamed for actions and received retribution. Why were they Blamed? Our Sages of Blessed Memory quoted an adage, “the conversations of children in public derive from what they hear their parents talk about. Rashi commented on this situation, had Miriam not heard degrading statements about the Holy Service in the Bais Hamikdash from her father, she never would have said those disparaging remarks.
HaRav Michel Yehuda encourages parents to focus on three important points with the intent to internalize them if they hope for their children to become committed Torah Jews in their adult lives.
Be careful to always express the greatest honor and praise for Torah and Mitzvos.
Be careful to always approach Torah and Mitzvah observance and practice with great joy and love
Be careful to limit children’s exposure in the home to ideas and outlooks that are very much in concert with the Torah perspective.
Although, HaRav Michel Yehuda didn’t list Tefillah as the fourth point, that advice is universal. Without siyata d’shmaya parents’ hopes for success are greatly compromised.